Pulling 30 Four

I played no organized sports
growing up (until ill-coached
efforts in my freshman and
senior high school years
on the track), so the closest
I got was the admittedly
extensive, five-child family
experience, highlighted
by the neighborhood
wiffleball games we used
to play all summer long.

I remember being invited,
once, to join a bambino league
(it was weird at the time,
and I'm still not sure to
this day if someone was
just being nice - which
would have been rare even
then - or if the offer
was genuine), but I was
routinely excluded even
from kickball games,
unless they were
organized by the school
itself, although I was
part of a rousing
dodgeball league and
seemed to do pretty well
on the playground,
at least for a while.

But I feel today
almost as if I'm still
participating in
wiffleball games
in the street, or
pretending to be
Dennis Eckersley,
waiting for the bus,
having a good time
but not being
"official" by any
recognizable standard.

Really, is that
so wrong?

Is it really just
my ego that needs more?

Or a desire to escape
employment traps
with an answer that
would be acceptable?

Pulling,
pulling,
pulling...